Filthy Rags + The Today Show
4 minute read
I had a melanoma in situ removed from my back two weeks ago.
For those in the back, in situ means “in place” meaning it’s in place in the epidermis, and thus it is considered stage 0, noninvasive, and very low risk. This is my second at bat with melanoma in situ, and it’s no mystery how or why I have had bouts with it… I’m a freckled sun worshipper raised by a perma-tan sun worshipper mom and a fair-skinned freckled father.
Put ‘em together, and what have you got? Bippity-boppity-melanoma.
I promise I’m not making fun of melanoma - I know I’ve got to cool it with the sun. I get quarterly mole checks, and I wear sunscreen daily thanks to Christina Jett.
I am, however, making fun of myself and here’s why:
Because this was my second spot, I knew the drill.
With my first spot however, I called my sister bawling crying, told her I had melanoma and needed surgery (left out the in situ) part, I called my mom and bawled her out for ever letting me in sun, and I sighed relief when my selfless, precious sister told me she booked a flight to come with me to my surgery.
Fast forward to surgery day, and my sister starts asking my doctor some hard questions… to which he replies, “You know this is in situ right?”
She burst out laughing, “MARY CLAY! It’s Stage 0?! Omg… poor mom. I’ve gotta call her. She’s on suicide watch.”
I never claimed I wasn’t dramatic, ok?!
Anywhooo fast forward 5 years from the first spot to present day, and thanks to a nudge from good ol’ ALC, I got my butt into the derm after over a year due to 2020 being 2020. Sure enough, spot two was found, and a second surgery was set to remove it.
I felt like an old pro - which by the way - feeling like an old pro at getting a melanoma removed is about as brag-worthy as being good at colonoscopies. Dream big.
After the removal (which was altogether unpleasant), I didn’t ask many questions about wound care, and I’ll be honest, this nurse wasn’t really giving any info anyway. I don’t know whether there was an *old pro* asterisk by my name or whether she just wasn’t into helping patients on Thursdays, but in my pride, I acted like I knew what I was doing and left the building.
(I need an Elvis joke so badly right here).
So fast forward 7 days into the two week period between stitches in and stitches removed, and I send my sister a pic of the irritation around the excision created by bandage tape. She said it needed open air… so I gladly acquiesced.
Every night I put coconut oil on it, v gingerly, and I took a couple epsom salt baths to help it heal because I’m into wellness OKAY, and it’s what we do. We also don’t use microwaves and would rather be strung from a pole by our toenails than watch you spray Round-up on our lawns.
The thought!!!!
With this in mind, I showed up to the appointment very ready to get the stitches out and also very ready to discuss my steps of wound care, specifically how my holistic approach should be something they implemented because I was CERTAIN this nurse would stare in awe at my beautiful job taking care of these stitches.
She lifted up my shirt, and I started to smile, here’s my moment. I’m going to change the world of dermatology from pushing chemicals to pushing herbs baby. This is it. I’ll probably start a podcast. Book deal next. GMA, Today Show. Gosh I need to get some outfits ready.
She opened her mouth and exclaimed, “Why does this look so gnarly?”
Ahem what?
“This looks terrible. It’s not infected, but it looks terrible. Did you put any ointment on it?”
And I really can’t even go into the rest of the conversation because it’s humiliating, but can you smell the humble pie? It’s still oozing out of my pores.
Soooo this fun (not) exercise got me thinking…
Is this how God sees our works and attempts at earning His favor… or even further… earning our salvation?
Likely. But in a super kind, loving, oh child no - stop striving way.
With the heart posture of self-gain, wordly approval, or self-sufficiency...
Playing the karma game looks gnarly.
Checking off the good girl quiet time, prayer, church attending checklist looks pretty gnarly too.
Rubbing your nose to the grindstone climbing the corporate ladder looks gnarly as well.
We all do this. Whether we’re walking with the Lord or we’re still confused on how eternity and heaven and salvation work… we rat-race around trying to prove ourselves - for what? For whom?
I’ve mentioned this verse before, but did you know our works are but filthy rags to the God of the universe? Our out-nicing, box-checking, and karma-keeping mean absolutely nothing.
He doesn’t need us! He is completely self-sufficient, omnipresent, omniscient, omnipotent, mighty, victorious, at the ready, never shocked, always there, all-powerful!!!!
Y’all. He’s better than my limited vocabulary could ever describe and better than the human brain can ever even imagine. Anything we do to earn His favor or that of the world will never measure up. The best of the best is preparing a place for you in heaven for eternity.
So why try? Why do anything good if our eternity is already sealed?
Great question.
We try because the Bible tells us to, and because we are joint-heirs with Christ. In the same way you try to uphold your earthly family’s reputation… God YOUR Father has a pretty insane reputation to uphold. As mentioned above, we will never fully uphold it - we are but mere man - but we try!
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9
He gave us his life to free us from every kind of sin, to cleanse us, and to make us his very own people, totally committed to doing good deeds. Titus 2:14
We are instructed to promote the kind of living that reflects wholesome teaching. AKA Practice what you preach. We’ve touched on the hypocrisy of Christians here, and while hypocrisy is somewhat unavoidable because we cannot stop sinning, it’s always, always opportunity to point back to Christ when (not if) we falter.
For me, understanding the freedom in Christ came when I realized I can (and should) always do my best to turn from sin and do good, but the outcome makes no difference on my salvation.
When God sees me (and you!), He sees us as our new selves cleansed by the blood of Christ. Rest in that!
Suggested Scripture + Reflective Questions
Sunday/Monday: Ephesians 2:8-10 What does it mean to you to be saved by grace?
Tuesday: Isaiah 64:4-8; Romans 12:3-5 Do you struggle with inflated view of self and works-based living? How can God help you change this?
Wednesday: Ephesians 1:11-14 If you have accepted the free gift of salvation, take a moment to praise God for sealing your eternity with Him by the gift of the Holy Spirit.
Thursday: Romans 8:26 Do you ever find it hard to pray? Have you ever employed the Holy Spirit to intercede on your behalf and pray for you?
Friday: Galatians 6:9 Can you recall a time when you grew tired of doing good? Did you give up or stay the course? What was the outcome?
Saturday: John 8:36; Titus 2:14; Galatians 5:1 What does the freedom of Christ mean? Do you realize you’re free from the bondage of sin? What comes to mind when you start to believe this?