How does the word “community” make you feel?
4 min read
A) Like it’s an overused buzzword
B) Happy! I love people.
C) Blech. Alone time, plz.
D) Somewhere in between all of these.
I typically feel all of the above depending on the day - except for A) … I feel that way always. ALAS, here I am yakking about the buzzword I loathe.
Can we call it something else? Connection... fellowship - nope, those annoy me equally so we’ll stick with community.
I specifically mean the Christ-centered kind.
There was a time I ran far from this. I coveted sleeping late on lazy, Sundays where my biggest concern was my next meal. I crushed them. I could binge watch any show with the best of them and chow down like nobody’s business. If it was a sunny Sunday, I was annoyed. Pull the blinds, I wanna hole up, baby!
Somewhere in my later 20’s this started to shift, and by the grace of God, church on Sunday mornings became a priority. Annnd as with any good thing, if given the time, I can make it turn ugly lol.
With the sweet gift of prioritizing church on Sundays, finding a Small Group (aka “community”) became an obsession. Any sermon on “get connected in a Small Group!” made me panic. I wanted to do it, but it felt hard to find one in our big church. I also felt like not having a small group meant I was less-than or not a good enough Christian. (Newsflash: there’s no such thing as a “good enough” Christian).
I remember sharing my angst about not having a Small Group with a Christian counselor turned friend, and she said, “But Mary Clay, THIS is community. Sitting here talking to each other about hard things and pointing back to Christ is community!”
What do you think of that?
Does it make the idea less daunting to understand that Christ-centered community means spending time with other believers who you can share hard things with and who hold you accountable?
Or does that kinda freak you out?
Either way - here’s the hard truth: I need it. You need it. We ALL need it.
If you’re reading this and thinking, I have friends who are believers… I call them to vent about hard things… is that Christ-centered community? Without knowing your hearts or theirs, I cannot give an emphatic yes or no, but I do know this: It certainly doesn’t have to look like a Small Group or a Bible study, but if you’re unsure whether you’ve got it, it definitely helps when this is the case! More on this down the page, but for now...
Why do we need Christ-centered community?
Well, hello, this life is dang hard! Having community who points you back to Truth (capital T because it just feels right) is invaluable. INVALUABLE.
1 Thes 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice. Prov 27:4
Also, minor detail, we cannot and will not grow without it, and the Bible tells us to engage in it.
And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:24-25
For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them. Matthew 18:20
As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Prov 27:17
You will feel less alone. This is true for obvious physical reasons but also for more emotional reasons. Just this past week, a dear soul in our Small Group shared how she struggles with consuming thoughts of fear - like she hears a story about a child suffering or passing away, and she immediately does down the “when is the shoe gonna drop in our life” rabbit hole. Hearing her share vulnerably made ME feel less alone! I struggle with this too, and as it turns out, every.single.woman. in the room did too.
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. John 15:13
Community will point you back to Christ when you’re suffering. Using the same scenario above, by saying your struggle out loud it loses power. Now we all know how to pray for her, and we can share the truth that God is sovereign over all things, He is for us, He knows our thoughts, He isn’t scared, and He always, always works ALL things together for our good and His glory.
What Christ-centered community has done for me
Today, I cannot fathom my life without Christ-centered community. My husband and I are in a Small Group with some of the most amazing couples (and especially amazing women - sorry I’m biased), and doing life with them FILLS MY CUP. These women pray over me, love me, and help me feel seen and known exactly where I am - not where they think I should be. And I try my darndest to do the same for them.
Just this past week, I shared a continuous struggle I will expand on at a later date (how annoying am I with this caveat), and they looked at me with the eyes of Christ. I’m not kidding you. The hands and feet of Christ covered me while they prayed over me. For the record, I experienced this same hands-and-feet love in our past small group as well as with current loving friends in Christ (both verryyyyy old friends and newer friends). I count them all as some of my biggest blessings.
Don’t miss this though: Biblical community is real. It can be messy. It is always WORTHY of your time and your walk with the Lord to find a place where you can share vulnerably with believers who can love you where you are and point you to Christ.
If the word vulnerable makes you itch - I get it. This world ain’t made for the vulnerable. It’s made for the boot straps, the get over its, the shake it offs, and the suck it ups. Here’s the catch: we ARE NOT MADE FOR THIS WORLD. We are but VISITORS. If it feels weird here, that’s because our souls (in Christ) are made for more!
But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ Phil 3:20
If you read history you will find that the Christians who did most for the present world were precisely those who thought most of the next. -CS Lewis
If you’re struggling to find Biblical community, I have a couple tips:
Step A#1 is to find a church home. If you need some suggestions, there are SO many great churches in Fort Worth, and I am also happy to help you research if you’re outside of the Funk!
Start a prayer group. Gather a few friends you know are believers (or who are maybe curious about becoming a believer) and start a prayer group. My Divas (LOL) Prayer Group is a cherished group of friends ALL from different churches and faith walks, and we share prayer requests each week. It’s super simple, and it’s a way to stay connected and KNOWN. One of our Divas lives in Midland - so know this doesn’t have to be a local thing thanks to technology! But of course do your best to spend time in person if/when you can.
They all joined together constantly in prayer, along with the women and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brothers. Acts 1:14
Join a local Bible Study. BSF is an incredible resource for Biblical community! One cool thing about BSF is it follows the school year, and they offer childcare. Ok that’s 2 things. You have a leader and a group of women for the fall and spring semesters, you break for summer, and you jump back in during the fall with a different leader and a different group. They have a rule where you don’t mention which church you attend which I think is super cool - keepin the main thing the main thing: God and His word!
Don’t give up. If a Small Group doesn’t stick, a Bible Study stops meeting, or you just feel like somewhere isn’t the right place for you - keep trying and keep praying for God to lead you. I’ll admit BSF wasn’t for me - I don’t know what’s wrong with me lol - but I know so many people who cherish it! We’ve also had Small Groups that didn’t stick. It’s ok! He’s always working. Stay the course.
What did I miss?
If you have questions, pleaaaaase never hesitate to reach out. I got a DM from a gal last week with some super hard questions I currently struggle with too, and let me just say, it made my heart LEAP. I am not a sage but a student and a servant, and I would love to dig deeper with you :)
Father God, thank you for your unending mercies. They are new EVERY morning. Great is your faithfulness! Thank you for the blessing of others to walk through this life alongside. It is a true gift! Father, I pray specifically for the person reading this who is searching for Biblical community. I pray you open doors and flood them with opportunity and/or open their eyes to Christ-centered community you’ve already gifted them! Thank you for the forgiveness from your Son’s death on the cross. Without it, without you, we are nothing! In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.
Suggested Scripture for the week:
Sunday/Monday: Proverbs 27
Tuesday: Hebrews 10:24-25, 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Wednesday: Phil 3:17-21
Thursday: Acts 1:14, James 4:2-3
Friday: Ephesians 3:20
Saturday: Romans 8:28